Posts Tagged brilliant
This Is Not A Drive By
Posted by One Gay at a Time in Gay Dating on June 28, 2012
Some of the strongest bonds you make in life are those shared with the coworkers you meet at your first job out of college. I remember my first week meeting one of the account directors who managed new business pitches. She was tall, gorgeous, fit, sassy as all hell and certainly knew how to dress to accentuate her sexiness.
From day one, she treated me like a kid — Like an intern. But, when I threw the sass right back at her, she elevated me in her mind to her equal and commented how we’d be good friends. I found her incredibly sexy and even had a small crush on her for some time. We continued to work together for a few years before I moved on to another agency, however, that didn’t mean we fell out of touch. Granted we saw far less of each other, but we still managed to find time to catch up either online or in person.
Since then, she’s left that agency and now works for a major radio broadcasting company. We’d been trying to meet up for cocktails after work for some time when she realized it would be really easy if she invited me to one of their concerts. She’d still be “on the clock,” but we’d get to hang and chat while taking in some awesome tunes. She sent me the calendar of upcoming performers and told me to pick a night.
We set plans to grab a quick drink before the Train concert so I could tell her all about my new man, CK. I marked my calendar, and as the date approached, I became more and more excited.
Then, days before the small venue concert, she told me to bring my man with me, however, there was a small change of plans. She apologized and told me she had to meet with clients, so she wouldn’t be able to grab a drink beforehand, but we could all go out after the show. “Sounds like a plan,” I replied.
That day, CK left work early and made his way home to change and drop off his bag. He met me outside my office, and we took the subway downtown to the venue. It was raining, so that didn’t help as we were trying to figure out where to go under an umbrella. We arrived just in time. I wasn’t able to find my friend, but soon enough, she found us seconds before the show started. She took us to the VIP section, and we settled in.
It was so good to see her. It’d been months since I’d seen her last, and she looked better than ever. Seeing her brought back a lot memories. We’d grown close over the two years we worked together. I came out after leaving the agency we worked at, and she was one of the people I decided to tell early on. She has a gay brother, so I knew she would be more than supportive. I had already talked to her quite a bit about CK, and she was thrilled with my new-found happiness.
As the concert began, my friend had to return to her clients to ensure they were thoroughly entertained. CK and I enjoyed each other’s company while we danced and bopped to the music. I was quite familiar with Train, but he wasn’t and neither was my friend. They both kept saying throughout the concert, “I had no idea this was Train!”
Let me tell you, they put on a good show. They audience was not the least bit energetic, which I’m sure is incredibly hard to perform for, but they did a stellar job! I spent most of the concert with my arms wrapped around CK from behind hugging him as we listened to the music swaying back-and-forth. We were being quite affectionate without making a spectacle of ourselves.
Afterwards, we all made our way to a little bar called The Macao Trading Co. We ventured downstairs, and the five of us cozied up to the bar for some cocktails and tapas plates. I felt a little awkward because I didn’t want to steal my friend away from her clients. I knew she had a job to do, and I didn’t want to interfere. But, I also knew, she wouldn’t neglect CK and I. She is a brilliant multi-tasker, I chatted a bit with one of the women on the walk to the bar, and we bonded when I learned we shared a common coworker/ex-coworker.
My friend ordered the group food and drinks to keep our bellies full and our spirits high. The food was AMAZING! I had a taste of everything, and loved/savored every bite! If you ever find yourself there, definitely be sure to try the mushroom and truffel croquettes. They are like heaven in your mouth!
When the two women were ready to call it a night, they said goodbye to my friend and made their way home. Finally, we could sit and relax and chat up a storm. CK and I were being affectionate, with my hand on his leg most of the night, but again, not drawing attention. I liked that about him. We could show we loved each other publicly without going over the top. It was interesting seeing him a bit on the quieter side. He’d met other friends before, but this time he was a bit quiet. When my friend started asking him more and more questioned, he opened right up, and they hit it off.
When CK excused himself to go to the restroom, of course we took the time to talk about him. She said, “I love him. I’d hang out with him outside you, and that’s saying a lot! He’s amazing!” I agreed with her and told her how amazing he really is. When I started to explain how well we hit it off and the conversations we’d had about our future, the smile on her face grew bigger and bigger.
It was amazing the information we covered while CK was in the bathroom. He was only gone about two minutes, but I managed to squeeze in so much gushing about him. As CK returned to the table, we were just turning the conversation to my friend’s love life. Apparently, she too found a man to make her happy. They’d been together for some time. I’d never see her so gaga for anyone before. She is a very powerful, successful, strong, beautiful woman who would intimidate the sh*t out of any man. Finally, she found a man who realized what he found and treated her right, all the while holding her attention. I was incredibly happy for her.
Not only were all three of us in love, but we were all at a bit of a crossroads in our careers. We were all faced with the decision to stay on our current path or shake things up and create a new path for ourselves. We all discussed our happiness with our current jobs, but fully discussed our lack of momentum and fulfillment in them. My friend told me I am too smart for my job gave both CK and I great career advice.
When the night was getting late, my friend was incredibly kind and picked up the entire tab. We went outside with our umbrellas, and she offered to share a cab with us. We rode north to CK’s apartment to settle in for the night. When we got out, I gave my friend a hug and said goodbye.
We got ready to go to bed, but not before fooling around a bit. We also talked about my friend, and he commented how much he liked her. I told him what she said while he was in the bathroom, and a smile lit up his face.
I was truly in love with this man. He meant so much to me. I had no problem picturing myself spending the rest of my life with him. I could imagine it all. No guy had ever treated me this way before. No guy put up with my sh*t like he did either. He was something special, and I realized this. So much so, I simply looked forward to spending more and more time with him, if not the rest of my life.
Follow @onegayatatimeFrom Metropolis to Hoboken
Posted by One Gay at a Time in Gay Dating on June 1, 2012
On April 20th, my blog turned one year old. I didn’t even realize the milestone was coming up until I looked back at the calendar on a whim one day. I felt the need to celebrate, but I hadn’t told Clark Kent about my blog yet. How could I tell him I wanted to celebrate something I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with him yet?
Instead, I celebrated privately with messages from friends and readers on the blog and over social media. I also had a date night planned with CK.
I invited him to come out to Hoboken for an evening ride on the bike since we weren’t able to do so the previous Sunday. This would be the first time he came out to Hoboken and would see my place. I was quite excited. I came home for work early after a pitch and made sure my place was acceptable.
He had to work slightly later and had to swing by home before he came over. It was a Friday night, and he would be spending it in my bed. As time passed, I sat on the couch patiently awaiting his arrival as the clock ticked on. I had no word from him. I tried calling, but no answer. Where was he? What was he doing? What was taking so long?
Since I was a little broken from previous relationships, my mind began to get creative with where he may have been or what/who he may have been doing. Finally, I convinced myself to put those thoughts out of my head. They weren’t born of any behavior he exhibited. They were simply a spawn of his presence on Grindr. I needed to learn to trust again. The thoughts were gone, and all I could think about was seeing him.
He finally arrived in Hoboken around 8:00. I wanted to watch the sunset with him. The way it reflects off the city skyline is breathtaking, however, the sun had completely set. We’d be taking a ride in the dark.
I picked him up on the bike at the PATH, and we set off along the waterfront to the palisades of Weehawken. I wanted to show him a spectacular view while taking the bike out for a spin. He’d been so excited about it ever since he first learned of its existence.
I really relished having him ride behind me. He pulled himself in tight against me. It was incredibly romantic, and I loved how he wrapped his arms around me. I felt like a great protector.
When we got to the palisades, we parked the bike and took a short stroll along the cliff. We talked while hugging and kissing each other with the spectacular NYC skyline in our periphery. We happened upon a family taking pictures of each other with the city in the background. He offered to take the picture so everyone could get in the shot. I thought it was incredibly sweet of him, and I fell for him a little more at that moment. Every moment with him made me want him all the more. Again, I wouldn’t let myself get too wrapped up in him. It was still early. I didn’t even know if he was interested in a relationship, let alone one with me.
After taking the picture, I told him about my desire to prank tourists in NYC. I would offer to take a picture of them. Just as I was about to snap the picture, I would turn as if to run. When they began to chase after me, I would turn around and snap a picture. It would give them a great experience and a fun story to tell for the rest of their lives, and they’d have a picture to accompany it. He thought this was brilliant and commented on his desire to do this himself.
That’s also when I told him about my life’s to-do list. I told him I wanted to share it with him later because it spoke volumes about me.
We made our way back to the bike and decided to grab dinner back in Hoboken. I knew of a great spot everyone had been telling me to check out but had not been to yet, Bin 14. We rode down the hill from the palisade and made our way back to Hoboken along the river.
I found a spot to park, and we walked to the restaurant holding hands. I wasn’t yet comfortable doing this in Hoboken, but it was something I needed to get over. I would be gay for the rest of my life. If I wasn’t okay showing affection in public, I was in for a lot of headaches going forward. Since we didn’t have a reservation, they asked if we minded sitting outside. I preferred it actually. However, this posed a new situation for me again. We would be street side, and if I wanted to show affection, all of Hoboken could see — Or at least that’s how it felt.
Slowly but surely, I got over this. I was rubbing his knee under the table and exchanging kisses over our meal. I didn’t care who was looking. I still felt a little self-conscious, but I was proud of myself for getting over this.
After discussing wine at length, we agreed upon a nice bottle of Malbec. It took us some time to figure out how to order from the tapas like menu. We still hadn’t figured out our sharing dinner groove, but it was fun to learn this together. I came to find we shared a lot of the same tastes and likes. It also helped we were both share quite an adventurous palette. We ordered a few plates and told the waiter we would continue to order until we had our fill.
The food was great, and the conversation was even better. I was still getting to know him, and I was mesmerized by his smile the entire meal. I was gaga for this guy. If it turned out he wasn’t interested in pursuing a relationship with me, I was going to be heartbroken. I was past the point of protecting myself. I’d already cracked the candy shell. Now, I was in his hands.
We declined dessert, and I made sure to give the waiter my credit card to pay the bill before CK even had a chance to think about it. This date was going to be my treat. I liked this new system. With all the other guys I dated, we both threw down our credit cards and split everything. This felt more like dating and more like a relationship. Each date felt special because one of us was treating the other to it.
We hopped back on the bike and rode back to my apartment. When we got there, it was already fairly late, so we headed straight to my bedroom. I was just finishing removing my shoes when he shoved me backward onto my bed. Since it was up on risers, the bed shifted to the side and collapsed. He was so scared he’d broken my bed, but I assured him it was already an issue. This had already happened with N once before. I’d already been searching for a new sturdy bed not on risers, and this would be the impetus that forced me to address the issue with much more vigor.
We fixed the bed as best we could and continued to make out. It’d been a week since we were last together, so of course we were both horny for each other. I hadn’t had sex since we last saw each other, but I wasn’t sure I could say the same for him. We hadn’t crossed the monogamous relationship bridge yet, and I had no right to ask that question yet. We’d only been dating a week. One step at a time I told myself.
Warning: The following may be too graphic for some. Regardless, we found ourselves naked, and I was grinding on his backside. Our passion was elevated to a new level, and we were all over each other. I couldn’t get enough of his body — It was purely amazing. I’d never been with someone so handsome, so sexy, so fit, so sexual. He was like nothing I’d ever experienced before.
Eventually, he reached behind himself, grabbed hold of my manhood and directed it in until I found myself deep inside him. Amazing sex ensued until we both had our fill.
I was incredibly happy once again. I had a man who could come to dinner and hold a great conversation, and a man who could satisfy all my sexual desires. He was the best of both worlds.
With that, we cleaned up and climbed back into bed. I was happy to finally be sharing my bed with him. This would be the first time in a long time my California king was being put to good use. We fell asleep in each other’s arms. He was my little spoon. Throughout the night, we changed positions many times, but never fully woke up. We slept great.
When we woke in the morning, CK had to head back into the city to begin apartment hunting. He’d been putting it off and needed to put his nose to the grindstone. We stopped for a delightful breakfast at Ganache while we got to know more about each other. When we finished, we rode through the Lincoln tunnel into the city. I couldn’t drop him in front of his building because there was a parade going up his street, so we said goodbye to each other in front of the Empire State Building. I couldn’t think of a more romantic way to begin my Saturday…
At the ripe age of 26, I came to a life changing conclusion. I'm GAY!
It took me 26 years to realize this and come to terms with it, but coming out's been the best decision of my life.
This blog is about my dating life in NYC and what happens next...
One Gay at a Time 