Posts Tagged relish
Monday passed by without me seeing Smiles again. I did speak to him however. We spoke while I walked home from work. He still had a migraine, and I tried to console him. I wished there was something I could do for him, but I was powerless.
He had a work event that evening, so he soldiered on. His migraine was lessened, but he still wasn’t 100%. I knew it was going to be a long night for him.
He called when the event was over to say hi and check in on me. I always relish his phone calls just to say hi and ask me about my day.
I explained to him I was watching the first Twilight movie. It happened to be on TV that night, so I made it a point to watch in an attempt to catch up to the current day release of Twilight: Breaking Dawn pt. 1. I was also able to find the second and third installments in the series on the guide over the next few days. Smiles seemed excited to see the movie, so I was putting in the effort to get onboard. I have to say, they’re certainly not amazing cinema, they’re not unbearable either.
I asked him to wait to see the movie together in the theater. He agreed. After talking about the series, he realized he’d never see the third installment, Twilight: Eclipse. I told him I would keep it on my DVR, and we could watch it together before hitting up the newest in the theater.
We were also coming up on Thanksgiving. I struggled with the thought of inviting him to come home with me. He is from and his family is still in Florida. I knew he wasn’t planning to go home, but I wasn’t sure if he’d have other plans. The thought of inviting him came from numerous places. I felt we were comfortable with each other, and I knew he would stand well with my family. He was very good at getting along with strangers, and I knew he could win them over, especially since this would be the first time they’d learn about my homosexuality. I knew it would have been a little early in our relationship to ask him to come home with me, and this is the main reason why I didn’t. I didn’t want him to think I was a little psycho.
In the meantime, I learned he finally did make plans for Thanksgiving. He was going to a few friends’ homes out on Long Island in the Hamptons and on Fire Island. I was happy he found some special people to spend the holiday with, but was a little disappointed I wouldn’t be spending it with him.
Before I went home, and he split for Long Island, I wanted to see him again. I suggested we grab coffee or something quick because I knew he would be quite busy with work leading up to our departures on Wednesday. He told me we’d have to play it by ear, but he would make a concerted effort to work it out.
I was worried I wasn’t going to see him before the long holiday weekend. We’d spent other weekends apart, so this shouldn’t be that big of a deal, but to me it was. I wasn’t spending the holiday with him, so I wanted the next best thing.
Tuesday evening I had a dermatologist appointment to have an ingrown hair taken care of. We were going to attempt to meet after as long as time allowed for it in his schedule.
This was the first time I’d see him following a workday in which he interacted with clients. He looked very smart and super cute. It was all I could do to keep my hands off him. He was happy to see me, but I could tell he was pretty exhausted from a long day. We ordered some small dishes because I was ready for dinner, and his dinner wasn’t until 10:00 or 11:00. The conversation was nice, and we discussed our plans for the weekend. He also expressed concern for the incision on my abdomen from the dermatologist. When we finished, we paid the bill and began to walk towards the PATH/his subway.
We popped into a fun travel amenities shop to check out some of the cool things we noticed in the front window.
We walked a little further and reached his subway. He began to descend the staircase, and I called after him to explain I wouldn’t be joining him since it didn’t take me near the PATH. He walked back up a few steps and gave me a quick kiss as he said goodbye.
It was very unceremonious and not very romantic, but I decided to concentrate on the fact that I got to spend time with him at all before he left.Follow @onegayatatime
Congratulations to me! (Or should I say congratilations to us, considering I feel this has grown to become a community and not just a place for me to spill the beans.) This site reached 20,000 page views last night, and I had more traffic yesterday than any previous day. I’m very proud of the community of bloggers and commenters interacting here. So, keep reading, and I’ll keep writing.
Anyway… On with the show…
Smiles and I rode the motorcycle through some decent traffic back to his apartment from Brooklyn. It was now fully dark outside since daylight savings time kicked in.
We hopped off the bike and climbed the stairs to his apartment. He suggested seeing Twilight: Breaking Dawn pt 1 in the car earlier that evening, but now that we were back in the apartment, it seemed he had a change of heart. Instead, he suggested we pick a Netflix movie and order sushi for the night.
To be honest, it didn’t matter to me what we did. It was all just bonus because I had no idea we’d be spending so much time together. I relished every minute. At this point, we’d spent 30 hours straight by each other’s side. This was often the case with me. As long as we were together, I was happy, no matter what we were doing.
Was I losing a piece of my own identity? Possibly. Am I okay with that? Yea. I think I am.
He pulled up a sushi menu, and we decided what to order. I asked him for more comfortable attire since I had been wearing jeans all day, part of which was riding on a motorcycle.
While we laid there, I placed my hand on his thigh with my thumb behind his knee. This was often how we watched movies. At one point he shifted a bit, so I pulled my hand back to another comfortable position. He reached down and placed my hand back from where I removed it. It sent a message to me he was enjoying the intimacy and my touch. He rarely verbalizes these sort of things to me. I never really know where I stand with him, and at times feel I am constantly auditioning for the role of the doting boyfriend. I feel it is part of the reason I am not climaxing with him. I haven’t yet felt comfortable with him where I haven’t been under pressure to make sure he likes me. I am hypersensitive to these sort of things, so when he does things like moving my hand back, I enjoy the moment for all its worth.
Our food arrived, and we ate in bed while we watched the conclusion of the movie. When it was over, we cleaned our plates, put away the leftovers and got ready for bed. Sadly, I still didn’t have a toothbrush at his place, so morning breath was sure to ensue. I did my best to brush with my toothpaste covered finger. Not very effective.
We climbed into bed and fell asleep next to each other. I’m always one for cuddling, so I would like it if we cuddled or spooned a bit before dozing off on the nights we slept together, but it wasn’t something I felt comfortable broaching just yet. Again, I was still thrilled I was sleeping over and wasn’t sent home hours earlier.
For every low point, there is a high point. The day had a nice start with a bit of an exciting/rocky afternoon. It concluded very pleasantly, so overall I had to seem is a success. I felt we were growing closer. No one spends that much time with someone unless they are extremely lonely or interested in a relationship with them. Or at least that is my line of thinking…Follow @onegayatatime