Posts Tagged Indiana Jones
Although things didn’t exactly end the way I would have hoped, I had a really great time with my new uptown Grindr friend. He was a very down-to-earth, sexy man whose body I found irresistible.
I made my way home on my motorcycle only to find my apartment full of my friends and my roommates’ friends. They apparently noticed my Irish exit, but I was shocked to find none of them texted me to find out where I’d gone. They didn’t seem to care much. They were all drunk and about to smoke.
I put my helmet in my room and joined in the fun. D pulled me aside and asked if I’d gone to hook up, and I didn’t lie. I nodded my head in agreement, and he said, “I knew it!” with a smile.
My roommate immediately mentioned breaking my glass planter that sits in the window, but failed to apologize for the act. She simply pushed it into a pile, plants and all, and left it there on the floor. After sitting in the room a solid ten minutes, my friend K announces, “Where’s [One Gay At A Time]?” I responded, “Really K! How many have you had!?” We all laughed.
The previous night, I talked to a guy on OKCupid who was quite an athlete. He seemed like a really fun guy, and I was anxious to meet him. We’d emailed a few times back and forth, and I learned he would be coming to Hoboken for the festivities in the evening. Ironically enough, he would be in the apartment across the street. The same apartment my roommate and I scoped out on numerous occasions, noticing a gay couple lives there. I texted him to see if he was there, but he told me he decided to stay home after not feeling well.
This, of course turned my attention to the apartment across the way. My roommate and I had scoped out this apartment many times starting on New Year’s Eve when we presumed two mo’s lived there. This night, they were having a party. We noticed many men, and we tried to make a sign with a sharpie and the inside of a paper bag. It was no use. Anyone’s attention that was looking out the window was drawn to our neighbors upstairs. They too were having a raucous party.
I decided to use technology to find a way to make friends with the mo’s across the street. I pulled up Grindr and tried to find anyone very close. When I finally got in touch with someone nearby and asked him if they were at that address, I came to learn that person had left the party already. I made many more futile attempts to reach out to the party. A few of us watched with curiosity when people moved into the bedroom, but nothing exciting happened. Our front window became a version of “Rear Window.”
When I grew tired of my new entertainment, I made my way to bed. It was a long day, but a fun day. I was beat.
The next day, I returned the favor of a friend for helping me move. I rode my motorcycle over to his new apartment and dug in moving bags and boxes. When we drove to his old place, I realized we were in the same neighborhood as Indiana Jones lived. I pulled out my phone and texted him to see if he was around. It’d been months since I last saw him, and I was anxious to see him again. We were due for a catch-up. I didn’t hear back from him that day, but I wouldn’t give up at that.Follow @onegayatatime
Indiana Jones didn’t arrive in my life in the most conventional way, however, he is a great guy — A great guy I want in my life.
As he was leaving my apartment the night he came over for a bottle of wine, he casually invited me to attend his next charity event. I was thrilled. He described the two upcoming events and told me he would send me an invitation. One such invitation arrived while I was out at the bar with my sister and my friend, K. I took the opportunity to tell them about this man. They couldn’t fathom how I managed to befriend this man, but both wanted to know how they could also access him.
I told them they were more than welcome to attend the charity event with me. The next day, I forwarded them the invitation, as well as to another friend and my roommate. My sister and one of my friends told me they were onboard to attend, even with the $50 donation requested during RSVP.
As we drew closer to the night of the event, everyone backed out except my roommate, who agreed to go the day of the event. I was thoroughly annoyed. I told my Indiana I would be there, so I couldn’t back out, but I did not want to attend alone. It would have been one thing if they never agreed to go, but that wasn’t the case.
My roommate and I walked to the Chelsea art gallery where the event was being hosted. We checked in and looked for Indiana Jones. He was standing in the center of the room greeting all the guests. We patiently waited until he wasn’t preoccupied before we moved in to chat him up. He was very happy to see us (He met my roommate briefly when he was at my apartment). He detailed some of the very important people who were in attendance. It was impressive. That’s as far as the conversation went. Too many people were waiting to talk to him — Understandably so.
It was impressive to see some of the results of his work. One of the walls was covered with artwork from some of the students in the school he built in India. It was touching. In the back of the event space, a video was being projected. Much of it was footage from the hospitals and schools and women’s cooperatives he built, but some footage was of him working in the field.
My roommate and I found a spot to sit and chat. We weren’t doing the best job mingling and networking. It’s tough to do without an introduction or ice breaker. Eventually, we made our own fun playing “Guess the Price of this Piece of Artwork.”
When the evening was coming to a close, we found an opportunity to steal Indiana away for a moment. He apologized for not being able to chat with us more. I assured him it was okay. It comes with the territory of hosting an event. He mentioned coming over for another night and another bottle. I insisted we would have to have him over for dinner some night. He detailed his busy schedule over the coming days, but we agreed we’d touch base and find time.
I had a very nice time supporting a very worthwhile cause. It was nice to get to see my new friend again, and I looked forward to seeing him again as well.
After leaving the event, my roommate and I went to Bamboo 52 to burn up a Groupon. We had a blast — Lots of sushi and a great dj. When dinner was coming to a close, I texted the sexy Grindr guy who invited me to cuddle a few nights earlier when I was leaving the city. I knew he lived in the vicinity of Bamboo 52, so I told him to swing by and say hi. It took him some time to get back to me, and by then we were ready to go after closing our tab. I told him we’d pass him on the street as we walked to Penn Station to take the bus home.
We ran into him half way to the bus. He was coming back from tennis. This was the first time meeting him, and I have to say, I was impressed. He looked great and seemed like a very nice guy. He complimented my roommate while still flirting with me. It was a quick ten minute interaction, but it certainly left me wanting more…Follow @onegayatatime
On my walk home from work, I called my new Grindr friend to see if we were still on for drinks that evening. Sadly, however, he told me he wasn’t sure he would be able to make it. He still had to walk his two dogs and had a few things he needed to take care of. I was very anxious to meet him that night because it was the last opportunity I would have before heading to Martha’s Vineyard for a week. I know when momentum breaks, enthusiasm also wanes. I told him, “Well, go take care of what you need to do, and if you still think you can do it later, let me know.” He was worried I was missing out on other plans waiting around for him, but I assured him I had nothing planned for the evening. He wasn’t keeping me from anything. Such a gentleman.
As time passed, I had the idea to just invite him to my apartment to share a bottle of wine. It was a very nice night, and I have a comfortable balcony we could sit and chat on. I texted him the idea, and he happily agreed. An hour passed, and I heard nothing from him. I cut up different cheeses and laid them out on a nice platter with grapes, crackers, and chocolate covered espresso beans. Just as I was about to call him, I heard a buzz at my door. I buzzed him in and told him to come to the second floor. I opened the door to find exactly what I expected to see. He threw his arms open and gave me a big hug, exclaiming, “I made it!” I’m a big fan of hugs and feel people don’t hug enough theses days. After a sweet embrace, he sat and I poured him a glass of wine. He commented on how nice my apartment was and told me how easy it was to get there.
I asked if he wanted to sit on the balcony and he graciously obliged. We grabbed the cheese platter and wine and made our way outside.
He began by asking my family background. I told him my father’s side is German and my mother’s side is Polish, Irish and Welsh. I am a European mutt. He told me his grandfather was a Nazi who escaped Germany once he realized what was going on and that he was in over his head. He came to the US and started a famous steakhouse. His grandmother was a Native American bootlegger from who made moonshine. I’ll let you figure out how the two met. They then divorced when she ran away with a man in a terrorizing biker gang
The previous night, he told me he was a cowboy at one point in high school in another county. He explained how similar this was to Brokeback Mountain (minus the sex), as men were paired up. Like all the other pairs, he developed an extremely close bond with the man he was paired up with much akin to a brotherhood. When the time came for “Indiana Jones” to move back to the states to go to college, he had to say goodbye to this close friend. They stayed up all night reminiscing and crying about how much they would miss each other. I was so very touched by this story. I asked where his friend is now, and I was shocked and disappointed to find they haven’t been in touch since he left. I scolded him and told him to rebuild that connection.
When he came back to the states, he went to art school. He was always fascinated by art, anthropology and archeology. After he graduated, he traveled to India and fell in love with the culture. He told me about how ingrained in the local society he became. He wasn’t simply a tourist.
When he came back to the states, he was setting up his studio. He was cleaning things up and came across a windfall possibly worth millions. Instead of taking this money and living a high life, squandering it on a lavish lifestyle, he did the unthinkable. He took the money and built a hospital in the remote areas of India. When I learned of this, I was truly amazed. It was an ultimate act of selflessness. I was sitting next to one of the greatest men of my generation. After building the hospital, he decided to start a charity. I watched multiple videos on YouTube describing the work he is doing. He has built schools and hospitals and set up women’s centers. Someone even followed him around for five years and made a film about his life and his work.
The previous night, I was watching Labyrinth. The subject of David Bowie came up. Indiana Jones not only worked with him, but knew him on a more personal level. He worked with many celebrities beyond Bowie. Through his charity, he has worked with people from Bono to the Dalai Lama. Through his work and art, he has worked on many movie sets, such as Beloved and Chicago. He’s actually close enough friends with Renee Zellweger that she texted him when she started dating Bradley Cooper. When I asked him who his favorite person to work with was, he replied, “No one’s ever asked me that before. Hmmm. Mother Theresa. She has this sexiness about her. And, not in the typical sense obviously.” I retorted, “No. I completely understand. She’d have to have a certain charisma about her to produce such a following. She has to be persuasive. I see that same charisma in you. I can see why you are so successful.”
I’m not a celebrity whore. They are people just like you and me. I treat them as such. I definitely respect their work, but I’m not going to go crazy just because they scribbled on a piece of paper for me. This man is a worldwide celebrity, but I don’t think he knows it. I made it a point to tell him. He’s known by people all over the world from the most remote corners of India to the Himalayas to Africa to the U.S. People greet him with warmth and respect. He truly is doing good all over the world.
I, of course, asked about the Oprah thing. He was very humble about the experience and tried to downplay the whole thing. I am most impressed by the media impressions something like that generates. His story reached so many people. I can’t imagine what it did for his organization. He was also in O magazine. When he was telling me about the movie about his life and the need for distribution or a venue, I simply suggested he contact Oprah’s people and get it on her new OWN network. He thought it was a brilliant idea and said he would make a point to mention it to the director/producer.
I asked him about his charity and how much overhead he had. He explained that a majority of it is simply him. I asked, “Well, who answers the phone?” He detailed a small staff, but it really all boiled down to him and his board of directors. We talked about his need to find someone who could take over the reins when he was no longer able to do so. It would be a shame for all that hard work to just stop because the driving force behind it disappeared. He needed to find a protegé.
He took the time to tell me not only about all the good works his charity is involved with, but also about his personal life too. We talked about his partner and he showed me some pictures of him, his dogs, his house in Vermont he tries to escape to, etc. It was nice to get to know him on a personal level.
When we finished the bottle of wine and the entire cheese plate, it was time for him to head home. He had to pack for his upcoming trip to India. As he stood up, he said, “We spent so much time talking about me, next time I want to hear all about you!” I joked, “You’re life is slightly more interesting than mine!” I walked him to the door, and we exchanged another embrace.
As I walked to my room, I had a smile from ear to ear. Who would have thought I was capable of finding such an amazing friend on Grindr? But, I did. This would be the start of a beautiful friendship, and I looked forward to every minute of it!
Sometimes someone comes into your life and just simply blows you away. You have no idea where they came from, and you have no idea why they are talking to you. They are simply amazing, and you feel you don’t deserve a minute of their time.
On a random Monday night, while watching Labyrinth with my roommate, I was poking around on Grindr. I came across a good looking torso so I messaged him my standard message, “Hey stud.” I don’t know why, but that line always seems to work. I think men can’t resist being called stud. I know I would be highly flattered if someone said it to me.
We began chatting. He was a really nice guy and quite a gentleman. I learned he lived not far from me in Jersey City. We started flirting a bit and swapped a few picrtures. I told him why I was on Grindr: I am looking to meet guys and see where things go. I told him about my sordid dating life, and what I was really looking for in a man. He told me I seemed like a really great guy and asked why I was still single. I told him I was hunting for my unicorn, a monogamous man who acted like a man and was willing to give me as much as I was willing to give him. I then turned the question on him. He said, “I never said I was single.”
This is the part of the conversation when my heart sinks. Every time someone says something like this to me, a little piece inside of me dies. There have to be guys out there who are happy with their relationships and aren’t involved in extra-curricular activities outside their relationship.
I asked him to elaborate. (I apologize if this gets vague, but I am doing so to protect this man’s identity… He is somewhat of a public figure as you will come to learn) He explained his partner is a performer who continued to work beyond the typical age of retirement in his field. Because of this, his partner has to take a lot of medication, and he thinks it has severely effected his libido. As a result, after seven years together, they haven’t had sex in a year and a half. On top of that, he travels the world for months at a time (he was gone for 5 months when we started chatting). My heart went out to him on this one. That is a long time. But, I still don’t see that as an excuse to sneak around and find sex outside the relationship.
Every time he asked for sex, his partner was always too tired or not feeling well. A year and a half of that is unacceptable. They needed to talk about it with each other, even if it was something his partner wasn’t interested talking about. He rationalized being on Grindr by saying he needed to feel sexy, so why couldn’t he flirt a bit. We had a very adult conversation about the whole situation. I told him he needed to force his partner to address their problems. Relationships are about two peoples’ happiness. If he wasn’t getting everything he needed in the relationship, he needed to speak up more forcefully. Basically, I talked him out of doing anything he would regret down the road. I never want to be something someone regrets. No one wants that negative energy associated with himself.
He replied, “Okay. Sorry for the pictures! Just friends!” I needed friends just as much, if not more than I need a lover. I was excited by the prospect because this man seemed to lead an exciting life. He was an amazing man who had a weak moment. I told him not to worry about the pictures and made sure to reiterate I thought he was a very sexy man. He loved his partner, and it was apparent. From then on, we had a friendly conversation to get to know each other. I could tell we both have very curious minds. I wanted to hear all about him and his life’s adventures.
In high school, he moved to another country for some time and was a cowboy. After that he went to college in the states. Following, he made an extended trip to a remote part of India and fell in love with the culture. When he came back to the states, he came upon a windfall amassing him a very large sum of money. Instead of squandering it, he put it to good use and started a charitable organization.
The man is basically Indiana Jones. I almost didn’t believe his story, but then discovered someone made a movie about his life. But the coup de gras was when I found out he was on Oprah. Not that she is the end all and be all, but she added legitimacy to his story no one else could equal. I was honored a man of this caliber was interested in being my friend.
We talked about the celebrities he’s worked with and the good he’s done in the world. In the back of my mind, all I could think about was the medium in which I met this amazing man. To anyone who says Grindr is simply a hookup, I feel you are sorely mistaken. Grindr is what you make it. It is simply the medium for communication. You choose the messages you send.
After I finished watching the movie, I called him on the phone to chat more. I was purely fascinated. Before hanging up, I made plans with him to grab a drink the following night. He agreed to come to Hoboken, as he had to travel to Edgewater to meet a friend. We would find a nice quiet bar to grab a glass of wine and chat. I was elated. The following night, I texted him to confirm our plans, but those plans would have to change…